How to break up with your boyfriend. ( for ladies)

                                                                  

           Okay ladies, this is your time in the spot light. Pay attention! Class is in session, Subject: Relationship 101. Topic: How to break up with your boyfriend. Well, unlike the lecture that i gave my fellow guys on the parallel topic, i don't have the time nor energy to be all formal here ( please bear with me), but i believe that ladies need to hear this straight and direct (with a twist). The smart ones will pay attention. I've had the misfortune of witnessing ladies breaking up with their boyfriends, and the way they usually go about it makes me roar with anger sometimes (Grrrr!). Listen ladies, if you've had it up to here (* making slashing sign at the top of my throat*) with your bumbling boyfriend and want to call it quits with him, that's good and fine. I'd probably be cheering you all the way, so long as you go about it the right way, and follow these simple steps.

Please Be Honest!!!
           This is one thing so many ladies are incapable of doing when ending a relationship! I really can’t convey how vital it is for you to be honest when breaking up with your guy. Not only does your honesty provide him with the reasons you’re breaking up with him (he's too nice to a fault, he’s too clingy, his socks never match, his breath smells like something the cat dragged in, you've lost your attraction for him, etc.), but it will also keep your guilty conscience from popping up on you later. Be honest with the young chap and you’ll hopefully have a clean breakup you can feel “good” about. (If you’re actually happy while breaking up with someone, I suggest consulting a therapist Fast!!. Don't give all those transparent lies (It's not your fault, I'm not ready for a relationship right now; and then you go on to date the jock down the street even before your words dry out). Be honest and real. He'll respect you more.

Don’t be fickle minded
          Many girls decide to break up on the spur of the moment, and then they regret it or end up feeling more miserable than the guy, especially when the guy decides to walk away. We’re talking about a relationship here, not some shopping sale. If you think you’ll be happier single, then reaffirm that thought and stick with it. Most girls are pretty fickle minded when it comes to a break up, and most guys know that. Don’t be that girl.


DON'T Leave Him any Hope!!!
           This sounds a lot crueler than it is, but it’s important not to lead a guy on as you’re breaking up with him. So if you’re done being with him, don’t do the “…just not RIGHT NOW, Mike thing".  That gives him false hope and when that happens, guys end up calling you the “B” word (no, not “beautiful”) or something.
Leaving him a sliver of hope only makes him into the guy who eventually leaves you handwritten letters in your mailbox with a small animal’s head attached. If you’re serious about the breakup, make it a clean break.If he tries cajole you on the matter paste a big No on your forehead. Trust me, he'll get one part of the "No" fast. either the 'N' or the 'O'!!

Please BE NICE!!!
           I get the line of thinking that says if you’re rude or mean when breaking up with someone then they’re likely to get over you more quickly. That may be true, but using that method will almost guarantee you being described in a less-than-flattering way. And we don’t want that. Really, there’s no reason to be brutal. I mean, you’re breaking up with the guy; you can at least be nice about it. Simply tell him you no longer want to be in a relationship with him and then tell him why (in the nicest possible way!) but be firm. He may cry (real men cry when a girl breaks their heart) and/or curse the heavens, but at least he can’t—in good conscience—say you were mean while doing it. And that’s a win, Lady!!
                                                           

PLEASE LEAVE HIM ALONE.... Once You’ve Broken Up with Him!!!!
           I know that you’re just the sweetest little thing that ever walked this earth and you just want to check on him to make sure he’s okay, but if you broke a boy’s heart by breaking up with him, leave him the freak alone!! There’s nothing worse than your phone blowing up with messages from the girl who just dumped you, making sure you’re “doing okay”. It’s awfully horrible (* excuse the phrase*), but it's true!
If you want the breakup to stick, then leave the poor guy alone. He needs to get over you and that can’t be done if you’re constantly checking on him etc. Leave him be and he’ll be just fine. I promise (unless he starts stalking you and mysteriously appear every where you go, then i suggest  you have a 911 speed dial programmed to your cell phone immediately!!).
      
         There you have it ladies, no more shenanigans. Do this and your break-up will go as smothly as a BMW sports car. Hope this helps. have a great time peeps.

Cheers.
Zukky.

How to break up with your Girlfriend (for Guys) part 2!

      Okay guys, Pay attention! Class is in session, again! The Subject: Relationship 101. The topic? How to break up with your girlfriend part 2. So sit back, buckle up and enjoy the ride because Mr lecturer is at it again. So continuing from where we stopped..........
                                                                   

           
          Be sensitive to her feelings! Gently explain to her why it won’t work out between the two of you. Let her understand that you are no longer happy in the relationship, and that it would be unfair to the both of you to continue when one person wants out. You don’t have to be curt and drop the bombshell, then walk away. Use your judgment to decide which day will be best to call it quits with her. If she is the emotional type and you think she will be heartbroken, do it on a Friday. This will give her the weekend to recover and be with friends, but if she is the type to plow full steam ahead, do it on a Monday. This will ensure that her busy work or school schedule will keep her mind off the relationship. When the storm calms down, being sensitive can ensure that there will be a chance of you two remaining friends sometime in the future.

            

          Keep it simple!! It doesn't have to take long. There is no reason to put her

through the whole history of why you are breaking up with her. She does deserve an explanation, but save her (and yourself) the exhausting history of how and why things went bad between you two. You have to be clear about why you think your relationship is at an end. Also, try and pepper that clear reality with a dose of regret. It is important for her to know that the decision to break up with her was also very difficult for you. By letting this be known, you make a soon to be ex-girlfriend a friend in mutual sorrow. A word of advice; don’t tell her you’ll call her when you have no plans of doing so!!! Part of keeping it simple is letting things end smoothly. Be fair to both you and her. Any deviation from these could result in her unleashing her venom on you later on, and you don’t want that. William Congreve made that clear in his quote.

            

          Be firm!!! There is a big reason why you decided to confront her with the end of your relationship. She may argue or act confused about why you want to end things between you two. You have to stick to your guns and also; be prepared for tears. Whether she’s glad you said something or not, chances are tears will be shed. Ending a relationship can bring about intense emotional display and she’s not about to spare you from seeing it all pour out at once. When she starts crying, be sympathetic, but don’t be drawn in by an overflow of powerful emotion. You have to be an emotional rock. If your new “ex-girlfriend” is the stoic type (saving her emotions for a later time when you are not around), don’t try to cajole a reaction from her. Let her be and tell her you are ready to talk when she is.

            
          Breaking up is never easy. But having the courage to follow through your decision will benefit both of you later on when the relationship has passed its romantic phase. In other to ensure that there is a strong possibility of remaining friends in the near future, it is important to follow these concise factors: mode of breaking up with her, where to break up with her, how sensitive you are, how simple you should keep it, and how firm you should be. Be true to your emotions and do what’s best for you and her.  
           Okay guys, from here on formality flies out the window and Professor Zukky takes a break. In comes happy go lucky Zukky. I hope that was enlightening for you guys? Any questions or comments, please don't hesitate to let me know. Thanks for your time and patience. Stay tuned for my next blog. As for you ladies, you class session is fast approaching. WATCH OUT FOR IT!!!!

Cheers.
Zukky.                                                               

How to break up with you Girlfriend! (for Guys!!) Part 1.

                                                               

           Okay guys pay attention! Class is in session. The topic? Relationship 101. Many guys seem to mess up in this area, so my job (As a self proclaimed relationship expert *smirk*) is to enlighten you. I hope you'll bear with me because I'm going to be all prim and proper in educating you, very formal. After all this is a class (Remember?) Okay here we go!!.
         
          Like William Congreve said “Heaven hath no rage like love to hatred turned, nor hell a fury like a woman Scorned”. Ending a relationship is never easy, irrespective of who is initiating the breakup. Being able to end one amicably with a girlfriend is an art which seems to have eluded most men recently. Some men over the years have devised different means of breaking up with their girlfriends, each person going about it the way that best suits him. In as much as these methods differ, one thing they all have in common is that there are consequences that follow as a result of many of them doing a lousy job of it. Women are different from men. This is one major concept most people fail to realize in relationships. The way attraction occurs for both sexes differ, so does the way both reason. Men are visual beings, in the sense that they are attracted by what they see. Women on the other hand tend to be attracted more by what they hear, and the personality of a man. Men are more logical in their way of reasoning, while women tend to be more emotional in theirs. As a man, breaking up with a girlfriend is akin to navigating across a mine field. If not properly executed, it can blow up in your face. You have to perfect this technique the way soldiers in the military Special Forces perfect their tactics before being deployed for a dangerous mission, because hypothetically speaking, they are one and the same. You wouldn't want a scorned ex-girlfriend to harbor a vendetta against you. Having made up your mind as a man to breakup with your girlfriend, these are the key factors you must take into consideration while doing that: how to let her know, where you let her know, how sensitive to be with regards to her feelings, how to keep it simple, and how firm you are while doing it.  
             

         How you inform your girlfriend about your impending breakup with her is very important. This must be done in person. You should never tell her over the phone, through a text message or an email. Out of respect for her, this must be done face to face. Phone calls and text messages are good for small talk, but this is a big issue. Most men even stoop so low as leaving sticky notes on their girlfriend’s door when she’s probably at work or school, and hightail it out of there. This is a very nasty practice and speaks volumes about the man’s character and lack of decency. It is natural to want as much distance as possible between you and her when you break the bad news, but fight that instinct and have the decency to say it to her face. One more thing; Never you tell your friends you are going to break up with her, while you haven’t told her it is over yet. This is one thing women consider sacred. Recently, some men have been known to breakup with their girlfriends on Facebook. The all too connected grapevine is not the place she should or deserves to find out that you are no longer interested. Your final decision to break up with her should remain private. Be man enough to face her and get it over with.

           Where you break up with her should be well thought out. It is advisable to find a neutral locale. It is unfair for you to break up with her in your place; neither should you be subjected to the awkward task of seeing a picture of you guys in a cozy mood hung in her sitting room. Look for a place where both of you can be comfortable and be able to walk and talk and express your feelings; preferably an amusement park. Crowded places like bars or restaurants are to be avoided like the plague, because if she makes a scene, there is no respectful recovery and no easy way out. However, fear of embarrassment is never a reason to leave her in the middle of nowhere, no matter how heated and emotional the conversation gets. There is no excuse for risking her safety. Look for a good place!!!

            

          Okay guys, that's it for today. Stay tuned for the remainder of the lecture, and ladies please wipe those smirks off your faces because your own class is coming up as soon as i'm done with my fellow guys here. Watch out for the second part of my lecture. It's COMING SOON!!!!

cheers.

Zukky.

Lincoln and Kenedy!!

 A friend of mine sent this to me a while ago. I've decided to share this with you guys. It's really deep!! don't you think so?

Now seat down, buckle up and enjoy the ride.... Like i did!! 

                                          

Abraham Lincoln was elected to Congress in 1846.

John F. Kennedy was elected to Congress in 1946.

Abraham Lincoln was elected President in 1860.

John F. Kennedy was elected President in 1960.

Both were particularly concerned with civil rights.

Both wives lost a child while living in the White House.

Both Presidents were shot on a Friday.

Both Presidents were shot in the head.

Now it gets really weird.

Lincoln's secretary was named Kennedy.

Kennedy's Secretary was named Lincoln.

Both were assassinated by Southerners.

Both were succeeded by Southerners named Johnson.

Andrew Johnson, who succeeded Lincoln, was born in 1808.

Lyndon Johnson, who succeeded Kennedy, was born in 1908.

John Wilkes Booth, who assassinated Lincoln, was born in 1839.

Lee Harvey Oswald, who assassinated Kennedy, was born in 1939.

Both assassins were known by their three names.

Both names are composed of fifteen letters.
  

Now hang on to your seat.

Lincoln was shot at the theater named "Ford."

Kennedy was shot in a car called "Lincoln" made by "Ford."

Booth and Oswald were assassinated before their trials.

And here's the "kicker":

A week before Lincoln was shot, he was in Monroe, Maryland.

A week before Kennedy was shot, he was with Marilyn Monroe.

AND...................:

Lincoln was shot in a theater and the assassin ran to a warehouse...

Kennedy was shot from a warehouse and the assassin ran to a theater...
I saw this had to share just in case anyone did not know.

April fools !!

                                                                

          The first day of April always comes with a lot of drama. It's as if all the pranksters were just let loose to unleash their best (or in some cases their worst) pranks on people. Practical jokes can be fun at times, unless you are at the receiving end, then there won't be anything fun about them.

  

          This years April fools day was no exception. The social media networks were going haywire with people flinging practical jokes about, waiting for poor suckers to be sucked in. The funny thing is that no matter how prepared you are for it, a good one will likely hook you in, depending on your mindset at that point in time. I've seen some funny ones, and equally some very strange ones. 

          

          A good one that almost threw me off was a message my friend sent to me all the way from Africa, saying that President Obama and his vice-president had resigned for one reason or the other and that the acting president senator Kerry had something to do with it. Under normal circumstances, that should have been a no brainier for me, but like i said, the mindset you are in that moment can make all the difference. The way he constructed the text as a breaking news story with a web page link for the full story really threw me off. i was in the process of opening the page when the light bulb went on in my head that this was an April fool's joke. Sure enough, when i opened the link, i found a funny logo calling me the biggest fool of the month.

 

         Other ones can look so genuine that you cant really be sure if it's an April fools joke or not. A friend of mine at school actually posted on Facebook that she had won a $5000 lottery. How do you dispute that? It's not so far fetched. I mean anybody could easily have won that amount. I must admit that i totally fell for that one. It wasn't until people started commenting and congratulating her and she only put up smileys that i suddenly smelled a rat. Something was fishy there. I happened to glance at the date and saw it was April first. Even at that i wasn't entirely sure. Others started getting suspicious as well. I called her out on it and she cheekily replied that i should go catch other fools. 

                                                              

  

           Some practical jokes can be very strange, even bizarre. A friend back home was telling about a young man whose girlfriend and his best-friend were both naked in bed, and when he walked in they both jumped up and shouted April fool!! I don't know how true the story is but that's stretching the April fools joke a little too wide don't you think so? Unless of-course i was the butt of the joke (which he denied was the case). How do you handle such a joke?

          

          I find the jokes amusing most of the time, but i also believe there should be a limit to that. Imagine being at the receiving end of that, what will your reactions be? I need answers folks.

Cheers.

Zukky.

Cactus Jacks Saloon and Singles.

    

             For every young person living in kamloops, the name Cactus Jacks Saloon (CJs) is probably a house hold name. Just as i mentioned in my earlier blog, few can envision a Friday night without CJs coming into the picture. A typical night at the CJs always has something special to offer, especially for someone who is bored on a weekend night and wants to be entertained.
          For some single folks residing in Kamloops, CJs is regarded in as the place to meet and hook-up with other singles. Although to someone who is not used to a nightclub setting, the scenario can seem quite hilarious at times because half of the people at CJs on a normal night are pretty much drunk, while the other half are headed in that direction. Observing the way young men and women interact on and off the dance floor can be quite interesting to someone paying close attention. 
         Different people come to the club for different reasons. For some men, it’s an avenue to pick up ladies, since most of the women are out there to have fun. While on the other hand for some ladies, it’s an avenue to get picked up by an interesting guy. If carefully observed, one would certainly see a few patterns developing. For some ladies, it’s a continuous battle to keep the wolf from the door. Since most of the ladies are drunk, or well on their way to being so, they usually move around in pairs or threesomes as if they are all hog-tied to each other, especially when going to the bathrooms. Come on!! I've head a young man out of frustration one night yell at a group of four girls if they actually need assistance to pee? Four girls heading into one tiny toilet? Boggles the mind at times. But the sad truth for guys is that this ensures that none of the ladies gets picked up by a drunken stranger thereby suddenly deserting the group. 
          Amongst the ladies there is usually the mother hen. She is the guardian of the group and to an extent decides if a guy is allowed to come and hit on any of the girls. Woe betides a guy if the mother hen doesn't approve of him. He's definitely in for an up hill task, because the claws come out. Mother hens sometimes remind me of rabid dogs protecting their territories. Only that these mother hens have bigger fangs.
        You would think that the presence of these mother hens would stop guys? nope! you'd lose your life savings if you bet on that. Some guys actually give new meanings to the words determination and perseverance with the way they go about pursuing the ladies. Mother hens or not, running on full tanks of alcohol, they plow ahead like a hunting pride of lions determined to get their preys irrespective of the obstacles present and ahead.The way both members of the opposite sexes go about it can be quite melodramatic at times.
               

           Generally the dance floor, the bartenders’ cubicle and the backyard where people go for cigarette breaks are the three main places where singles meet and interact with each other. These areas are strategic points where the young men lie in wait for their targets.The security personnel at CJs take very clear and decisive actions against patrons misbehaving, or too drunk to know any better. And those under the age of 19yrs are screened out at the entrance. The general atmosphere at CJs is always jovial, although one is likely to experience drama once in a while (That's when the alcohol is speaking). 
          Weekends at Cjs is some thing to experience, if not for anything else, just to loosen up and have fun. That's it for now folks. Say tuned, there's more where this came from. Have a nice day.
Cheers. 

Thank God It's Friday!! (T.G.I.F.) In kamloops.

             
               In these complex modern times, going out in the town is a way to enjoy the weekend and escape boredom. This gives people something interesting to update their Facebook profile on and generally relieve stress. Going out to bars and nightclubs has certainly grown in popularity in recent times. This is becoming increasingly popular in small and medium-sized towns.
            
                The experience here in Kamloops BC where I currently reside is no exception to the rule. Places like the Cactus Jacks Saloon (CJs to its adoring patrons)  give new meaning to the phrase "Thank God it's Friday". Students and workers alike (who make up a fair size of the towns general population) always look forward to the weekend in other to relieve the stress of a tough and demanding week in their respective schools and workplaces, have drinks (even get drunk in some cases) and CJs is like the towns watering hole.
  
              So one might ask, what is it about Fridays that just has people going through different emotions? On Fridays, some people are reluctant to go to work, or school in the case of students. On the other hand, some folks are usually in jovial moods and it's almost infectious. I can understand the fact that its the last of the five working days (many work on Saturdays too) but there's just that innate feeling everyone gets on a Friday afternoon/evening that makes them very impatient to get away from wherever they are and just get the evening started. Most students at school would rather have an emergency appointment with the dentist than have classes on Friday afternoons. Drinking and parting await. Funny enough, for a student, the weekend is never really that long because assignments, tests and quizzes have a funny way of creeping up on you before the weekend is over.

                  What is it about Fridays? Don't get me wrong folks. I love Fridays, I'm probably the biggest culprit when it comes to the TGIF concept. Going out to bars and clubs is stuff I find difficult not to do Friday nights. I just don't understand why. I just discipline myself when I have to and put my foot down if I don't want to go out, but there's just something unexplainable about Fridays.I've thought about it long and hard but can't come up with any satisfactory answer to me. What do you think folks? Drop your comments below. Thanks.
Cheers!!
Zukky.